Hidden costs nobody warned me about

The kids are more resilient than the fear tells you. Steady and honest is enough. What helped me was writing everything down — dates, who said what. It kept me sane and it mattered later.

From the counselling chair, the hidden cost I see most isn't on any spreadsheet — it's decision fatigue. Budget some support for yourself the way you'd budget for the lawyer; it keeps the expensive mistakes down too.

the double-everything phase got me. two of every kitchen thing, two wifi bills, school supplies at both houses. it levels out, but budget for the stupid duplicates.